There was once a manager in an office who had been drinking heavily. Everybody was talking, even snickering, behind his back. Because he was the boss, nobody would dare broach the problem to his attention. He was heading over the precipice. Until one day a guy mustered enough courage to approach him. Instead of talking about him, he dared to talk TO him. “Sir, we’ve observed that you’re drinking too much,” he begun. “Don’t you see you’re killing yourself? If you don’t stop, you’ll destroy yourself and us.” Somehow that jolted him to his senses, it proved to be a “shock therapy.”
Embarrassed and remorseful, the manager eventually took the painful steps to rehabilitate himself. He joined Alcoholics Anonymous, and learned to kick the drinking habit. He changed because someone had the guts to stand up to him. Many of us have the notion that loving someone means always agreeing or not hurting his or her feelings. But true love and friendship also means criticizing or disagreeing when a loved one goes off the right path. Sometimes the best service you can do to a person you love is to criticize or disagree with him or her when he or she is not doing right.
The Sunday Gospel says, “If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault” (Mt.18:15). In teaching us about responsibility for others, Christ says that part of love is to correct the faults of others. The gospel message also teaches us that when we have to correct people, like a spouse, a child, a friend, a co-worker, it should not be harsh or oppressive, but in a spirit of charity and concern. As the writer Frank Clark puts it: “Criticism, like rain, should be gentle enough to nourish man’s growth without destroying his roots.” Just as too much water destroys the plant so does too much criticism destroy a person’s growth.
When we correct others, we have to be ready to be corrected in return, simply because none of us is perfect. In trying to correct other’s faults – a son or daughter, a friend or colleague; the following Aesop's Fable is worth considering. Once the sun and the wind made a bet as to who was mightier as to compel a guy wearing a jacket to remove it. “That’s easy,” the wind bragged as it blew hard and violent. But the more he did, the more the man wrapped his arms around the jacket. After several more attempts, the wind gave up. It was the turn of the sun. Using no force nor violence, he simply kept raising the temperature. In no time, the man started to perspire. Unable to bear the heat, he quickly removed the jacket. The moral: A persevering gentle approach is more effective than a harsh, negative one.
Because of the weakness of human nature, we will always find fraternal correction or dialogue if necessary in our lives. If certain people are wounded or hurt as a result of past experience, then they are no different from the man lying on the road between Jerusalem and Jericho. We must, like the Good Samaritan, take time out and care for them. That is our work of mercy.
#8. A JOKE FROM ST. JOE! Grammar teacher: “Alvin, change this sentence to a past tense. ‘She gave me a present.” Alvin: “She gave me a past.” Right?
This Sunday is Grandparents Day. Pray for those who have gone before us and give full respect to the living ones for some day you might be one of them. The 11th is Patriot Day. On this day, we remember those who have died on that fatal day of 9/11, and honor those firefighters, police officers and emergency medical officials who had helped the victims of 9/11 and had died. On the 13th, we have the memorial of St. John Chrysostom, Bishop and Doctor of the Church, Patron of preachers and of Istanbul (Constantinople}. It is the Feast of the Exaltation of the Holy Cross on the 14th. The next day is the memorial of Our Lady of Sorrows. And the 16th is the memorial of Ss. Cornelius, Pope and Cyprian, Bishop and Martyrs. This is all for now, watch for the next bulletin. God bless!
Your Priest-Servant and Parochial Administrator,
Fr. Reggie